Self-Development Dr. Shelley Sommerfeldt Self-Development Dr. Shelley Sommerfeldt

Are New Year's Resolutions Possible?

It’s the beginning of a new year and we often want to get started on the right foot, but setting New Year’s resolutions and actually achieving them can be near impossible. Here are some tips to help you stay focused and positive about your goals.

Setting goals for the New Year is a great tradition that many of us participate in, but unfortunately the success rate of achieving resolutions is very poor. The success rate of actual completion of goals has been reported at 12%. So how can we be more successful in reaching goals that we have set out for ourselves? 

First, it’s important to understand that setting a meaningless goal at the beginning of the year may not be as helpful or useful as creating positive intentions or even healthy habits. The research has shown that healthy habits can positively influence overall lifestyle rather than aiming for achieving goals. 

Here are some tips to help you stay focused in the New Year:

Get in the Right Mindset:

You have to believe you can accomplish your goal in order to actually reach it! Get motivated and excited about your goal and get others involved too. If you plan with a friend or family member, you won’t feel alone while working toward your goal and doing it with others can be more fun too!

Cautious Selection:

Spend time selecting your goal. Often people make a nonchalant statement like “I’m going to lose weight in the New Year,” but really do not take the time to think the goal through and really plan what weight loss will mean for them. The selection is important to keep you on track so really think about something that you want to accomplish, something that is important to you. If you are passionate about your goal and it is something you really want to accomplish then you are more likely to follow through and be successful.

Make Your Goal Measurable:

Setting a goal that you can monitor and track is really important in order to keep you motivated and seeing the finish line. If your goal is too general then you are more likely to not stay focused. You can log your progress in a journal or there are several apps that can help with goal setting. Again, this can help you see your accomplishments along the way and increase your success.

Start Small:

Make a goal that is realistic and something reasonable that you can accomplish. If our goal is too big or we do not see ourselves making progress then we are more likely to give up. It is much better to set a small goal that have you accomplish and need to set the bar higher rather than a goal that is too large you end up giving up. 

Share Your Goal:

Tell others about your goal and let people know what you need in order to accomplish this goal. This keeps you accountable and others may provide support and reinforcement to you as you work toward your goal.

Give Yourself Positive Reinforcement:

It’s important to reinforce and reward yourself for achieving progress. Rewarding yourself with give you that boost of confidence and reinforcement that you need in order to continue working toward your goal or healthy habit.

Now you have some tips to help you to accomplish your New Years resolution, good luck, and know that you can do it!

Happy New Year!

ONLINE SESSIONS AVAILABLE

If you are needing support, virtual services are available, see Online Coaching with Dr. Shelley. Services are provided by telephone or online through a HIPAA-compliant telehealth portal, which allows you to be in the comfort of your own home during sessions & have increased privacy. Appointments can be booked online or simply email Dr. Shelley with any questions or appointment requests.

Blog written by: Dr. Shelley Sommerfeldt, Clinical Psychologist, Relationship Coach & Founder of the Loving Roots Project, an online wellness practice specializing in personal growth, mental wellness, & relationship betterment.

Follow the Loving Roots Project on social media for weekly blogs & video posts:

More Blog Topics:
20 Date Ideas To Try at Home
20 Date Ideas To Try at Home

While we may all know that quality time with our partners is essential as it boosts our connection, it can be challenging to think of new and creative ways to spend time together. Many couples may face challenges arranging babysitting, and others may be financially strained due to rising living costs, finding going out to be expensive. Alternatively, some may simply enjoy the comfort of their own home and, therefore, would like to find activities they can enjoy there.

5 Tips for Increasing Emotional Connection in Relationships
5 Tips for Increasing Emotional Connection in Relationships

Emotional connection is the foundation of a healthy, loving, and thriving relationship. Whether you're nurturing a romantic partnership, family bond, or friendship, cultivating emotional intimacy can deepen understanding, build trust, and create a lasting connection. While every relationship is unique, there are core principles that can help anyone strengthen emotional ties. Here are five practical tips for increasing emotional connection in relationships:

9 Essential Self-Care Tips for the Holiday Season
9 Essential Self-Care Tips for the Holiday Season

9 Simple Self-Care Tips for the Holidays

The holiday season is a time of joy, togetherness, and celebration—but it can also bring stress, exhaustion, and overwhelm. Amidst the hustle and bustle, it’s crucial to prioritize your well-being. Here’s a deeper dive into nine practical self-care tips to help you stay balanced and at peace this holiday season.

10 Ways to Improve Your Relationship When Your Partner Won't
10 Ways to Improve Your Relationship When Your Partner Won't

Relationships can be incredibly rewarding, but they also require effort and cooperation from both partners. When one partner feels unsupported, it can lead to frustration and resentment. If you're in a situation where your partner isn't actively helping to improve the relationship, it may feel like you're carrying the emotional load alone. While you can’t force your partner to change, there are ways to work on the relationship that may inspire growth and reconnection.

What's the Difference Between Therapy and Coaching?
What's the Difference Between Therapy and Coaching?

In the pursuit of personal growth, mental health, or life fulfillment, many individuals find themselves wondering whether they should seek the help of a psychotherapist or a coach. While both professionals can play pivotal roles in guiding individuals through challenges, psychotherapy and coaching are distinct disciplines with different methods, goals, and frameworks.

5 Tips for Living With Intention
5 Tips for Living With Intention

With a few helpful tips, we can learn to live a more fulfilling and meaning life. By prioritizing things, experiences, and people in our life who bring us the most joy, we can live with more intention & happiness.

Developing a Gratitude Mindset
Developing a Gratitude Mindset

Let this serve as a reminder of the importance of feeling grateful, thankful and appreciative for the good things in our life. Fostering an attitude of being grateful and more positive can have many benefits.

Ways to Increase Affection in Your Relationship
Ways to Increase Affection in Your Relationship

Levels of affections can change in a relationship and often drift apart leaving partners wondering if their love and passion will survive. Here are some tips to get you back on track with love, affection, and intimacy in your relationship.

Conflict Resolution for Couples
Conflict Resolution for Couples

Finding healthy & more productive ways to resolve conflict in a marriage is essential to forgiveness, moving forward & relationship happiness. Check out our latest blog for tips to conflict resolution for couples.

Getting Through The Holiday Season - COVID Edition
Getting Through The Holiday Season - COVID Edition

Managing the holiday season can be stressful and challenging. This year especially has create new and different struggles due to the COVID19 pandemic. Check out these 10 tips to help you cope and maintain positivity during the holiday season.

Read More
Online Services Dr. Shelley Sommerfeldt Online Services Dr. Shelley Sommerfeldt

Online Versus In-Person Coaching Services

Online counseling and online therapy have picked up in popularity recently. With the ease of finding an online therapist and the use of technology from your own sofa, it’s no wonder why. People often wonder what online coaching services would be like in comparison to going into an office. Read more about online vs. in-person services.

When beginning an online business, I debated at length about providing services solely online versus having office visits as I have previously done. I thought long and hard about my decision. I read lots of research studies that have been conducted about the difference in efficacy and challenges that may arise depending on if you are meeting in person versus online. Surprisingly, I found that the research shows outcomes of online services are just as effective as office visits and meeting face-to-face with someone in person. I have also noticed a big movement toward online therapy services, although I will have to admit after working for years in an office setting where I met my clients face-to-face, having my first Skype call was a bit odd simply because it was something new and different. However, after several calls, it began to feel like second nature. I find that once you make a personal connection with someone then talking over the phone or online comes with ease.

I will say that this is very much a personal choice based on your own comfort level. If you are searching for services and feel that telehealth and virtual services would be too awkward or you have tried online services and just did not feel like a good match for you, then you should definitely search for a local provider. There are some great online directories that will help you find someone including: mycoachmatch.com or noomi.com. Also, if you are facing a more serious mental health condition and need traditional psychological services versus coaching, then I would recommend finding a mental health provider in your area. You may start your search for mental health services through your health insurance or you can also search online directories such as psychologytoday.com for a psychologist in your local area. 

However, for those who may see the convenience, ease and comfort of online services, then why not keep up with the modern digital age? Let’s face it, the times have changed and we are definitely more digital than ever before! Online counseling provides more of an opportunity to meet at your convenience without restrictions due to scheduling, timing or travel. When you are able to meet online then you can be in the comfort of your own home or office without the worry of having to travel to an appointment. The online therapy option also allows you a bit more privacy considering you do not have to walk into an office somewhere or sit in the waiting room with others passing through. You can simply sit in the comfort of your own home or office and connect with your online coach without anyone knowing. It’s simple, private and convenient. 

Online coaching services also offer the opportunity to find a variety of options with services. You have access to many more people, specialities and a variety of coaches and therapists than just the local people in your area. Online counseling services can connect you to professionals in each and every state as well as worldwide! This opens so many doors. This allows for ample opportunity to choose from a variety of specialties and areas of focus that you may not be able to find locally. Many people, especially in rural communities, may have a hard time finding mental health services available in their area or finding a professional who they feel they match well with or has the specialty training that they need. So being able to search online really broadens the criteria and allows for many more options.

There are lots and lots of coaches and therapists available. So when looking for someone to work with, be sure and review their credentials, look at their experiences, watch videos or read their written work to get a sense of who they are as a person. Most importantly, once you find someone, make sure that you “click” with that person when you speak to them and have a compatible personality and style. If you are finding that you just aren’t the right match, then try your search again and keep working to find the right person for you. Research suggests that it is the relationship between the two people that has one of the greatest impacts on effecting change and outcomes of the sessions. So believe me, it’s worth the time and effort to find just the right person for you.

Read more about the Loving Roots Project online services for individual and couples & our self-guided online wellness classes.

ONLINE SESSIONS AVAILABLE

If you are needing support, virtual services are available, see Online Coaching with Dr. Shelley. Online services are provided by telephone or online through a HIPAA-compliant telehealth portal, which allows you to be in the comfort of your own home during sessions & have increased privacy. Services are available for couples or individuals. Appointments may be booked online or simply email Dr. Shelley with any questions or appointment requests.

Research:

Barak, Azy, et al. (2008). A comprehensive review and a meta-analysis of the effectiveness of internet-based psychotherapeutic interventions. Journal of Technology in Human Services, 26.2-4: 109-160. http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/15228830802094429#.VI8vaCvF_hs

Wantland, D. J., Portillo, C. J., Holzemer, W. L., Slaughter, R., & McGhee, E. M. (2004). The effectiveness of Web-based vs. non-Web-based interventions: a meta-analysis of behavioral change outcomes. Journal of Medical Internet Research, 6(4). http://www.jmir.org/2004/4/e40/

Other Articles:

What you need to know before choosing online therapy. https://www.apa.org/helpcenter/online-therapy

Is Online Therapy Worth The Money? https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/between-the-lines/201802/is-online-therapy-worth-the-money

Blog written by: Dr. Shelley Sommerfeldt, Clinical Psychologist, Relationship Coach & Founder of the Loving Roots Project, an online wellness practice specializing in personal growth, mental wellness, & relationship betterment.

Follow the Loving Roots Project on social media for weekly blogs & video posts:

Blogs that may interest you:
20 Date Ideas To Try at Home
20 Date Ideas To Try at Home

While we may all know that quality time with our partners is essential as it boosts our connection, it can be challenging to think of new and creative ways to spend time together. Many couples may face challenges arranging babysitting, and others may be financially strained due to rising living costs, finding going out to be expensive. Alternatively, some may simply enjoy the comfort of their own home and, therefore, would like to find activities they can enjoy there.

5 Tips for Increasing Emotional Connection in Relationships
5 Tips for Increasing Emotional Connection in Relationships

Emotional connection is the foundation of a healthy, loving, and thriving relationship. Whether you're nurturing a romantic partnership, family bond, or friendship, cultivating emotional intimacy can deepen understanding, build trust, and create a lasting connection. While every relationship is unique, there are core principles that can help anyone strengthen emotional ties. Here are five practical tips for increasing emotional connection in relationships:

9 Essential Self-Care Tips for the Holiday Season
9 Essential Self-Care Tips for the Holiday Season

9 Simple Self-Care Tips for the Holidays

The holiday season is a time of joy, togetherness, and celebration—but it can also bring stress, exhaustion, and overwhelm. Amidst the hustle and bustle, it’s crucial to prioritize your well-being. Here’s a deeper dive into nine practical self-care tips to help you stay balanced and at peace this holiday season.

10 Ways to Improve Your Relationship When Your Partner Won't
10 Ways to Improve Your Relationship When Your Partner Won't

Relationships can be incredibly rewarding, but they also require effort and cooperation from both partners. When one partner feels unsupported, it can lead to frustration and resentment. If you're in a situation where your partner isn't actively helping to improve the relationship, it may feel like you're carrying the emotional load alone. While you can’t force your partner to change, there are ways to work on the relationship that may inspire growth and reconnection.

What's the Difference Between Therapy and Coaching?
What's the Difference Between Therapy and Coaching?

In the pursuit of personal growth, mental health, or life fulfillment, many individuals find themselves wondering whether they should seek the help of a psychotherapist or a coach. While both professionals can play pivotal roles in guiding individuals through challenges, psychotherapy and coaching are distinct disciplines with different methods, goals, and frameworks.

5 Tips for Living With Intention
5 Tips for Living With Intention

With a few helpful tips, we can learn to live a more fulfilling and meaning life. By prioritizing things, experiences, and people in our life who bring us the most joy, we can live with more intention & happiness.

Developing a Gratitude Mindset
Developing a Gratitude Mindset

Let this serve as a reminder of the importance of feeling grateful, thankful and appreciative for the good things in our life. Fostering an attitude of being grateful and more positive can have many benefits.

Ways to Increase Affection in Your Relationship
Ways to Increase Affection in Your Relationship

Levels of affections can change in a relationship and often drift apart leaving partners wondering if their love and passion will survive. Here are some tips to get you back on track with love, affection, and intimacy in your relationship.

Conflict Resolution for Couples
Conflict Resolution for Couples

Finding healthy & more productive ways to resolve conflict in a marriage is essential to forgiveness, moving forward & relationship happiness. Check out our latest blog for tips to conflict resolution for couples.

Getting Through The Holiday Season - COVID Edition
Getting Through The Holiday Season - COVID Edition

Managing the holiday season can be stressful and challenging. This year especially has create new and different struggles due to the COVID19 pandemic. Check out these 10 tips to help you cope and maintain positivity during the holiday season.

Read More